Wine Time 10/11/2009
 
About two years ago my wife and I began a tradition of sorts. Well I can't say we started it, we simply followed a daily tradition my parents started when I was a kid. We have dubbed it Wine Time. When my father would come home from work after a long day, he and my mother would sit down in the family room with a glass of wine and discuss the day’s events. Work, the kids, the frustration and accomplishments of the day to day living.

Somewhere I had forgotten about their time spent together, just Mom and Dad. As a kid I saw that Mom and Dad talked, but what I didn't see is that this was the time they reconnected. After being separated by the responsibilities of life and commitments, this was their time to refuel in their marriage.

Vicki and I began taking the time to reconnect when we began to see a distance forming in our marriage.
Let me see if I can set the scene. We come home and get comfortable, sweats, shorts, whatever the weather allows, we pour a glass of wine and light a candle in the family room. The candle is a form of flag telling our boys that this is Mom and Dad's time to sit and talk. The candle is a form of measurement of our time together. Now it took some time for the boys to learn that the candle is an indicator that this is our time, but soon enough they gave us the gift of ”Wine Time". Now you don't have to drink wine, you can have coffee, tea, or a cold glass of water; it’s not about the drink, but the time.

Wine time has gone anywhere from a half hour, to three hours... At times we get lost in just discussing the day, plans for the weekend, a summer trip, or just the challenges of our day.
The only rule of wine time is making it a daily commitment. You may ask yourself, daily? What could we possibly spend three hours talking about? Well the length of time is not important, but the time together is.

That is to say, having that time each day to reconnect. Commit to thirty minutes a day.  Did you know the average couple spends 2.8 minutes a day talking...?  That is less then twenty minutes a week in conversation that means most of us talk more with our boss then our spouses.  I challenge you to try it, your communication will improve, your relationship will improve, and men your sex life will improve.

As much as men are physical, women are emotional; she needs that time of intimacaey as much as she needs air.
Try it, you won't be sorry.
 


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